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Momfinitions

Ever notice how parenthood inspires a whole new language? We call these words Momfinitions. Perhaps you recognize a few of these new parenting terms that haven't quite made it into Webster's—yet. Read some of our Momfinitions, and after you've had a hearty chuckle, feel free to submit your own Momfinitions in the comments below!

Booty call

[BOO-tee kawl] noun: A shout from the bathroom letting you know it's time to go wipe someone's butt.

Sleevekerchief

[sleev-KUR-cheef] noun: What you use to catch your kid's snot when you're out of tissues.

Diapergami

[dahy-per-GAWM-ee] noun: That secret parenting fold that turns a nasty diaper into a tidy package ready for the trash.

Keything Ring

[kee-THEENG-reeng] noun: What your keychain becomes in a teething pain emergency at the grocery store.

Boobifier

[boob-UH-fahy-er] verb: The act of using one's boob as a pacifier.

Wuce

[woos] noun: The watered-down juice that's left in the bottom of your kid's sippy cup after you've refilled it throughout the day.

Unhappy Hour

[UN-hap-ee-OU-er] noun: The hour between 5 and 6 PM when every mom in America is desperately trying to entertain whiney and hungry children while simultaneously fixing dinner and tidying up the house.

Four Dora Day

[FAWR-dor-uh-dey] noun: One of those days when you ignore all TV limits and let your kids watch four, five or even six episodes of Dora in a row.

Justaraisin

[juhst-uh-REY-zin] exclamation: What you tell your kids when they catch you sneaking into your secret chocolate stash (e.g., "No, I'm not eating chocolate. It's justaraisin. Want one?")

Peemergency

[pee-MUR-juhn-see] noun: The moment after you've loaded 10 bags of groceries and three kids into the car and you've just pulled onto the highway, and your kid decides to tell you that he has to go potty. Right. That. Instant.

Invisaowie

[in-VIS-uh-awhw-ee] noun: An owie that's so small you can't see it—but still requires a bandage to stop the crying.

Snooze Control

[sn-OOZ cun-trol]noun: The act of handing your kid the remote so he can flip to Nick Jr., allowing you to catch a few more ZZZs.

Toppler

[tawp-LER] noun: A topless toddler, usually caused by an unprepared mommy forgetting to bring along a change of clothes.

Boy-o-sphere

[boi-OH-sfeer] noun: That weird, stuffy, puppy breath kind of smell that permeates a boy's room, especially when they've kept their door closed all day. Is it the laundry? Their shoes? Can't quite place where it's coming from, but you'll know it when you smell it.

Thanks to: Square1

Spelling Bee Champ

[spel-EENG bee ch-aa-mp] noun: What you have to be when the kids are old enough to know what you are talking about so you have to start s-p-e-l-l-i-n-g.

Thanks to: Alliebeck



Have some Momfinitions of your own? Share your Momfinitions with us in the comments!

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7/24/2009 - 10:29AM
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Peed Racer - what a dad becomes when he realizes there's a dirty diaper to change...
7/24/2009 - 10:27AM
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Food-sortizen - the ability for your toddler to sort out the vegetable in the bite of food and spit just that bit out.
7/20/2009 - 8:51PM
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http://cli.gs/mfinit --- My Contribution - from "barguing" to "snarcasm". PLEASE ENJOY! Also feel free to go and comment, and leave a link to yours in my comments section! Let' cross pollinate. peace, n gratitude, -LaSara
7/19/2009 - 9:13PM
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http://www.aparentinsilve... Here are mine: Dine-and-diss: 1)When a parent lovingly makes a meal for her child, only to have said child completely reject the meal; 2) Although you have taught your child mealtime manners, child still loudly says 'It's yucky!' when presented with food as a guest in another home or family function. I was so embarrassed, at my mother-in-law's this weekend Charlie did a total dine-and-diss. Disaster relief: FEMA-worthy work provided by that rare soul who stays and assists with toy cleanup at the end of a playdate hosted at another parent's home. I love Leticia, she always provides disaster relief at the end of playgroup. Peenial: A child's blatant denial of her need to urinate. "Do you have to go to the bathroom, we'll be on the road awhile?" "No Mom, I just went." Honey, Eve is in total peenial, we'll be stopping at an Exxon before we're out of town. Screamapillar: A very hungry baby swaddled in a receiving blanket, crying for mama and milk. Sorry Sarah, got to go and get the screamapillar out of the crib. [Full disclosure: This is a Simpsons character and the use in reference to a baby must be credited to my brother-in-law George, who is funnier than Seinfeld and needs his own show STAT, top federal security clearance or no.] Momup: As opposed to makeup or a pretty getup, momup is a smattering of fast grooming passes and clothing grabs performed in a meager attempt to look presentable before heading to school drop off or other function. Usually momup is donned when in need of a shower and is a look you would never have tried to pull off before procreating. I can't believe I ran into my old boss in momup, thank goodness we didn't chat for long.
7/17/2009 - 7:49PM
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leg beards- what my 4 yr. old calls it when he notices that I haven't shaved my legs in a couple of days. "Mommy, you need to shave your leg beards again. They're getting really long this time!" I thought everyone in the doctor's office would fall out of their chairs when they heard that!!!
7/15/2009 - 3:41PM
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lion stripes (adj.)- the word your toddler uses to refer to your stretch marks. "ooh mommy, cool lion stripes!"
7/15/2009 - 3:31PM
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Mommy Luck: the only day you absolutely have to leave the house in the morning and your kids decide to actually sleep in!
6/26/2009 - 3:38PM
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Slug Hug - when a toddler hugs your leg and wipes his/her runny nose on your pants at the same time, leaving a slimy glistening slug trail in the process
5/9/2009 - 4:34PM
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Ok -I thought of some Momfinitions!: Vagina Monologues-[vuh-jahny mono-uh-lawgs: Your birth story-Especially if you gave birth vaginally. Beauty Cream-[byoo-tee-kreem]: The combination of spit-up,baby lotion,and whatever that sticky stuff is on your kids hands that you seem to be wearing most of the time. Maybe some of it will actually help with wrinkles or something ;) Tazddler-[taz-dler]: When your toddler goes all Tazmanian devil-Knocking things down,throwing their toys around,and just generally making your house a complete mess in about 2 seconds! =D
5/9/2009 - 11:00AM
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These are great! True-Booty Call -A whole new meaning! Oh and I think we can all relate to the Unhappy hour,Juastaraisin,and Snooze Control! =D
5/9/2009 - 10:14AM
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my favorite is booty call :)
5/7/2009 - 5:23PM
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uh oh- the international toddler word for "mom's gonna be REALLY mad when she sees this
5/7/2009 - 2:59AM
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Sprinkler System (SPREENK-LER SIS-TOM): What happens when your naked son pees through the netting on his Pack-N-Play onto the dog.
5/6/2009 - 7:06PM
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sorry, the net goofed on me
5/6/2009 - 7:05PM
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Four Pablo Day [FAWR-Pah-blow-dey] noun: One of those days when you ignore all TV limits and let your kids watch four, five or even six episodes of The Backyardagins in a row.
5/6/2009 - 7:04PM
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Four Pablo Day [FAWR-Pah-blow-dey] noun: One of those days when you ignore all TV limits and let your kids watch four, five or even six episodes of The Backyardagins in a row.
5/5/2009 - 10:16AM
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MMMMMMIIIIIINNNNNNNNEEEEEE- [Mine]- what your child is screaming about and you sometimes (okay maybe most of them time) give them just so you can stop the screaming!
5/4/2009 - 10:02PM
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Oregonian - that's what i eat for lunch too - but i call them lunchovers! when we go to brunch i call them brunchhovers!
5/4/2009 - 8:36PM
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Balanced Lunch: My daily lunch that consists of sandwich crusts, apple cores, half-eaten chicken nuggets and sips of juice out of sippy cups (I never have time to make anything for myself so I just scavenge off of my kid's plates!)
5/4/2009 - 6:30PM
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I love these! You guys rock!


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