Sex After Childbirth

Between the soreness, the bleeding, the bloating and the sleep deprivation, sex was probably the last thing on your mind in the few weeks after you had your baby. But now that a bit more time has passed, you may find your libido blossoming again. Or maybe yours hasn't quite blossomed yet, but your partner's is in bloom like a lily on Easter Sunday. Either way, renegotiating your sex life can be complicated after you introduce a new baby to the family. Luckily, there are tons of families with a second child, who are living proof that you will get back in the sack again.
What You're Thinking: "I am a hot mama!"

• Of course your baby is still the center of your universe, growing faster than a Chia pet, and becoming more gorgeous and irresistible every day, but this newsletter is all about YOU—because you, mama, are AWESOME!

Your body's been through a lot. A lot, a lot. So it's perfectly normal if you're not feeling up to getting down—whether it's been 6 weeks or 16 weeks... Take it easy on yourself and give yourself some additional time to heal physically, if you feel you need it. And, when you are ready, prepare yourself for some physical sexual side-effects you might expect from your postpartum body:

• When you are ready to get back in the action, expect the unexpected. There's a good chance sex will feel differently than it did before you gave birth. If you had a vaginal delivery, things may be a little looser than usual. But, hey, that's why Kegel exercises were invented!
• As you're climbing back on the horse, so to speak, you might also want to consider riding side-saddle... OK, not literally, but the thing is, missionary position tends to put pressure on the sorest spots of a post-pregnancy body, so consider this a great excuse to test out some new positions.
• And while you're trying new things, add personal lubricant to that list. Post-pregnancy and breastfeeding hormones can cause vaginal dryness. Luckily, there are lots of great (and fun!) types and brands to test run.
• Unless you're looking to get pregnant again, don't forget the contraceptives. The old myth that breastfeeding = birth control just isn't true. Ask any mom with two kids eleven months apart, if you don't believe us!
• And if you are breastfeeding, be aware that a romp in the sack can easily be accompanied by a bath in breastmilk, due to leakage. Keep some towels nearby to keep things dry or even consider investing in a Shower Hug to staunch the flow. Or you could just plan to take a sexy, post-coital shower or bath together. (Who knows? It might just set you up for round two!)

Your physical healing isn't the only thing to consider as you get ready to restart your sex life after childbirth. There are psychological and emotional things at home that can throw a wrench in the works. Coincidentally, though, the 'take is slow' theme carries through here, as well. (Don't you just love advice that advocates relaxing?) Need tips on getting your head back in the game? We've got 'em. Read more ...

• Having Sex After You've Had the Baby
• Keeping the Sizzle in Your Sex Life
• I lost interest in sex after having a baby. How can I regain it?
• What to Do When You Have Mismatched Desires for Sex

Cook It: Sex on the Beach
Looking to get in the mood? Whip up this lusty, fruity cocktail.
Do It: Do you wish sex with your partner were more exciting?
Share It: Where Have All the Cat Calls Gone?
One mom wonders if she's still got it going on.
Discuss It: Chat with other new mamas and papas on our Baby Board.

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All babies grow and develop at different rates. So please don't compare your kid with so-and-so's baby from across the street, you'll just drive yourself nuts. If you have any concerns, bring them up with your pediatrician at your baby's next checkup.