...2-3 days. I had gotten better after high school, when appearances mattered less. By the time I got married i was only about 15 lbs under weight, when i got pregnant I was only 10 lbs under weight, i lost weight at first with morning sickness but by the end of the pregnancy i had gained 25 lbs. People kept trying to take pictures to document my pregnancy, and I've actually ripped some of them up, because I thought I looked so fat and ugly. One of the more traumatic experiences was to go buy maternity clothing, trying it on, and saying "its big, but thats ok, i'll be big enough for it soon". I had envisioned that as soon as the baby came out that I'd put on my old clothes, and that didn't happen. It took about 9 months for me to be able to wear my pre pregnancy clothing again. I got back down to about 8 lbs underweight in between pregnancies.
With my second pregnancy, i didn't have as many issues with gaining the weight, but i didn't have morning sickness, and because i'd already had a baby and gotten down to normal weight, i wasn't worried that it would happen again. i gained 50 lbs. my baby is currently 10 months old and i'm still 10 lbs over weight, but only 1 pants size bigger than my regular clothes.
I won't lie to you, I still have issues with my weight and body image, and on bad days i guilty feelings when i eat, and other days i skip food altogether, but if I didn't eat regularly, i wouldn't have the energy to take care of my children (the ones i worked so hard to bring them here). And i can't think of a word to describe it, but on bad days I have "ill" feelings towards my children for what they did to my body. But I still love them, and wouldn't trade them for the world.
I think you'll find the same, that being a mother changes your priorities completely, and you no longer have time to worry and obsess over the things you did before. Hang in there, it will get better.
- Dec 16 2007, 11:05 PM
...understand and can help you. And by the way- I looked at your profile and you are absolutely beatiful- so you hav eevery reason to be comfortable in your own skin. And your kids are super cute as well! Do it for them!!!
- Dec 17 2007, 12:45 AM
...the progress is really really slow. I don't think a serious eating disorder can be kicked without help. Even though it's really motivating to do it for the kids, I think it's still important to get help - even if it's a support group or something like that. My mom had an eating disorder and she tried to hide it from me. I wasn't aware of her behavior as a kid, but I still picked it up myself.
- Dec 17 2007, 01:49 AM
...pregnant. It was strange because I knew that I was supposed to eat well for my baby, but a tiny part of me obsessed over the fact that I HAD to gain weight and I struggled. Fortunately, my OB found counseling for me and I was able to overcome it (and I delivered two healthy babies!). I'm so grateful-- I would've felt awful had something happened to my kids because I was obsessing over my weight. Once my babies were born, I surprisingly had a much easier time. I was breastfeeding so I knew I had to eat well for them and the baby weight seemed to fall off because of the breastfeeding. So, hopefully that's what'll happen to you. Anyway, I agree with everyone else that professional help or a support group would be great for you-- I know that I can't do this by myself and the only way that I've gotten better is with the help of my therapist.
- Dec 17 2007, 03:02 PM
...probably need some help too.
- Mar 2 2008, 04:39 PM
