Parents who think sending their kids to school sick is okay

I get upset when people send their children to school when they know for a fact that they are sick.  Runny noses and a small cough is one thing but vomiting and running a fever are another thing.  They really need to take a look at when you should send your kid to school and when you shouldn't.

if you think kids arent swapping bodily fluids just because they arent coughing and sneezing then you can't have spent much time around a class size group of kids. i would venture a guess that if you used a black light in the avg class that sucker would light up like a christmas tree. the younger the kids are the worse it is. when i volunteer at Gigi's school i come home with the slobber of no less than 3 (apparently healthy) kids on me that i notice and i'm only there for two hours and i dont share pencils and crayons with them. they are sitting right next to each other eating, chewing with their mouths open, laughing over each other's food and sprayin' it instead of sayin' it and if i had a nickle for every kid i see at that school that can't seem to keep their hands, sleeves, books or anyhting else they can fit in their out of their mouths i'd be a rich woman. an elementary school class room is a day long spit swapping extravaganza, all day every day.

so, yes, a sick child has plenty of time to spread the germy love before they show symptoms and it's not an unlikely scenario.

i guess maybe it's because i have spent alot of time around abject poverty that i can entertain the notion that sometimes good parents have no choice.  hell i've stood outside a door and listened to a 19 yo single mother beg not to be fired from her minimum wage job for wanting to leave to go pick her sick child up from daycare.

I am posting a lot on this thread because it has really struck a nerve with me. I know it is hammered into us that we are not to judge other people but it is a very short jump from not judging to using poor judgement ourselves. Sending kids to school sick is poor judgement. Even if you have a reason, it is bad parenting.

Everyone has reasons for their choices. It does not make those choices good or even neutral. There are bad parenting choices and we should be able to recognize them as bad and it is ok to say that there are bad parenting choices. It does not make them horrible people. It does not mean that they are failures it means they made a bad choice. I have made bad parenting choices myself. My daughter does not have much of a social life because I have social anxiety. I have a reason like all people have reasons but it is still bad parenting.

For the health of your child, please read up on how flu and colds are transmitted from a reputable site or talk to a health care provider and how to protect your child from these viruses.

It is spread from direct contact with bodily fluids. It is possible to catch it from someone who is not having symptoms but usually only if you are kissing them or sharing fluids in some other way. The normal way it is transmitted in children is coughing, sneezing and runny noses. This is why it is not likely to be spread from casual contact with someone who is not having symptoms.  Contact with the fluids can be direct from a person or it can be left on surfaces.  This is why handwashing is so important and teaching kids not to touch their face or put things in their mouth.

Sorry that's not a myth. If it was, my daughter would never be sick. Most sicknesses are contagious before you start showing symptoms. Obviously, I would never let her purposely be around a sick child since I stay home with her, yet she still manages to get sick sometimes.. Then come to find out the children she was with are sick a couple days later..

last year AND this year i got multiple letters home b/c of "unexcused" absences, i.e., Gigi was sick but not sick enough to take to the doctor. last year they threatened to call CPS b/c she missed 6 days over a 2 month period w/out a doctors note! i have a personal rule that if she's had a fever in the last 24 hrs she doesnt go and i dont care what the school says or does.

it's definatly not as cut an dry as "all parents who have ever knowingly sent a sick child to school are bad parents"

Wow, I didn't realize that was an issue. That stinks!

While that is the logical thing to do, schools here are terribly under funded and they do encourage children to go to school, even with a cold, because they wont get funding if ther are absent. My daughter goes to a charter school and is already in danger of being removed because of her absenses. She got the flu a couple weeks ago, so I kept her home and now I may not be eligable to enroll her next year. 

This is sort of a myth. While you may have some of the virus active in you before you have symptoms, the way that cold and flu is spread, from contact with fluids spread from coughing, sneezing, runny nose and all that, makes it much much more likely to be spread once there are symptoms. The virus is even at a lower level in the body before you have symptoms, ut us possible to spread it but unlikely.  It is one of those common knowledge things that every one knows that is actually not really true.

My issue with this has as much to do with a parent risking other children as it does for the neglectful treatment of their own child. When you are sending a kid to school ill, you are leaving him in the care of a person who is not informed about the illness and is unable to give a sick kid appropriate care. In most cases, if the school is informed, they are legally required to send the kid home. They are not allowed to monitor temperature, give medication and a classroom environment is one that makes it difficult for a child to take in many fluids. The teacher would not even know that any sort of extra monitoring is needed. A terrible and risky thing to do to a child.

The problem here is that flus and colds are contracted before symptoms even start showing. The flu for example, you are contagious for days before the first symptom even starts. By the time the kid gets the sniffles, its too late. 

Aside from that, I know my daughters school will not accept any absense unless there is a doctors note, or unless the fever is above 102 and there is vomitting. 

Kids in public schools get sick. Ever parent knows this. Get your flu shot. 

Its wrong of you to assume that people who can't take off have unnecessary luxuries and that is why they can't take off. I stay at home with my daughter but honestly, your post annoys me. some people can't save ANY money and live paycheck to paycheck and just have money for food and necessities, esp with this economy.

The problem is, some people simply can't afford to take off. Its really as simple as that. Some people have to work 60 plus hours a week just to put food on the table for their kids. Im a sahm and my husband works ALOT so luckily Im home but in single parent households, esp, its simply not an option sometimes. You also never know if maybe that child told the parents that they were feeling fine. I would be upset like you if this were my child but sometimes you have to understand the other side.

I have a very understanding boss!  And I appreciate him for it!  But not everyone has that, and not everyone has paid sick leave!  And not everyone has family in the area!  Not everyone has friends that they could leave their children with in the area!  And if some parents don't have paid sick leave, understanding place of employment, family or friends in the area, I certainly can't and won't expect them to ask a stranger on the street or in the store to watch their children!  In this economy, people can't just quit their jobs and get another one that is more flexible with that!  So, kids will go to school sick!  We need to make sure we teach out kids to not touch their faces throughout the day, wash their hands regularly, and use hand  sanitizer so they won't come home sick!  So, I'm lucky I could take the day off and work from home if I need too, and I have Lot's of family around that can watch her if I need it!  But I also understand not everyone has that!  And I will not accuse them of bad parenting! 

I think paid sick time is a legitimate thing to debate but I am not sure it is will be especially helpful in stopping the spread of disease.

My daughter has a school day of 3 hours. It is not a substitute for day care for any of the parents and nearly all of them are stay at home moms or dads or work shifts so that there is a parent or grandparent home with the kid every day. The moms will stand in line before class with their kid spreading mucus everywhere talking about the gym, their show that they recorded or whatever they are getting back to. People just don't think. We usually email the teacher when our little one is staying home, she has commented how it doesn't matter that she stays home, everyone is already sick there anyway.

My husband has no actual sick days that can accrue but he can take unlimited paid sick days. If it is more than a certain amount in a row they just convert the person to short term disability. We thought this was a genius move by the management. By not giving people a set number of sick days, they never consider the days theirs. It is always company time that they are taking so they never feel that they are entitled to take  a day whenever they choose or that they have to take them and will actually be able to stay home when they are truly sick. People still come in sick so as not to put other people out.

In his last company they accrued days off. People took them as soon as they got them and then had none when they were actually sick. They used sick days as mini vacation days then came to work sick.

The first person in the article is a private contractor. She works for herself and unless she is an outlier for some reason, makes really good money. She still went to work (at a school!!) with the flu.

It is peoples behavior and thinking that needs to change more than anything. They need to think about how what they do impacts everyone not just themselves and plan for bad things to happen because they will!

Thought this was kind of interesting, though a little OT. 

http://finance.yahoo.com/news/flu-season-fuels-debate-over-paid-sick-time-160609193--finance.html

I got to also say, if you can't afford to take a few days off for your sick kid you need to re-do your finances. Sell something, don't go out, cancel cable, save some money for an emergency. It's called being a responsible adult.

I worked for a childcare and it was very common for parents to give kids tylenol for a fever before they dropped them off and get annoyed when I called them about noonish when the tylenol wore off. Seriously, tylenol isn't going to cure your kid or make them not contagous. Ticked me off because the parents would somehow blame me for their inconvenience. I had a parent yell at me once for coming into work with a runny nose, the SAME parent who would bring in her kid sick....um I wanted to ask her "where do you think I got it??"

knowingly sending a kid to school sick is bad parenting.

There is no need to miss work for a routine illness if a person has a plan in place. I have been in this town 6 months and already 2 people have asked if I can watch their kids in an emergency. I am actually a backup to their plan. They have someone already but wanted to be sure.

It may be akward for some people, asking friends and family members if you can count on them, but it is their kid and their responsibility.

no it's not an appropriate place for a sick child, and people who can help it certainly SHOULD, but sometimes it can't be helped, that doesnt make the person a bad parent. i know several of my husband's employees wouldn't be able to pay thier bills if they missed a day of work, esp if they have to pay for a day of day care on top of it as most daycares dont give you a discount if your kid misses a day or two. life can not always be ideal. sure, they probably could have made better choices in life so this wouldnt be a problem, but no one can say they've lived their life perfectly.