Bad Parenting Advice #342: Dealing With Cursing Kids
I think I may be the worst mom ever. Today I accidentally taught my toddler to say the F word. How will I know if I'm going to turn my perfect little baby into that dude with the neck tattoo who works at the gas station next to the trailer park?
So here's what we think you should do. First, build a time machine. You might need to get your hands on a 1985 Delorean. Or Michael J. Fox in a puffy vest. And also a "flux capacitor." (Try Home Depot, Libyan terrorists or, failing that, eBay.) Then, go into the future and see what happens.
Have your worst fears come to fruition? Of course they haven't! See, you're a good mom. You're just exhausted. Two glasses of red wine and 10 hours of sleep will have you fixed right up.
But now that you have that time machine, you might want to go back to last Saturday night at 8:05 PM and write down the winning Powerball numbers. Then when you win, you can hire someone to do your laundry, unload your dishwasher and clean your toilets, freeing up valuable time for important things like Facebooking and watching TV. And you can afford to buy that "So You Think Your Baby Can Read" thing so it can teach your precious offspring to say, read and spell the F word.
That would be awesome.
So here's what we think you should do. First, build a time machine. You might need to get your hands on a 1985 Delorean. Or Michael J. Fox in a puffy vest. And also a "flux capacitor." (Try Home Depot, Libyan terrorists or, failing that, eBay.) Then, go into the future and see what happens.
Have your worst fears come to fruition? Of course they haven't! See, you're a good mom. You're just exhausted. Two glasses of red wine and 10 hours of sleep will have you fixed right up.
But now that you have that time machine, you might want to go back to last Saturday night at 8:05 PM and write down the winning Powerball numbers. Then when you win, you can hire someone to do your laundry, unload your dishwasher and clean your toilets, freeing up valuable time for important things like Facebooking and watching TV. And you can afford to buy that "So You Think Your Baby Can Read" thing so it can teach your precious offspring to say, read and spell the F word.
That would be awesome.
Provided byKristin Wilson Keppler & Julianna W. Miner
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