Kellie Martin's Parenting Style: Stabilizer

I have been a perfectionist my whole life. I have always wanted to be really, really good at whatever I did: ballet, school, acting... you name it! When I started acting at age 7, I not only knew my lines, but I knew everyone else's on the show. I'm a major overachiever. I run marathons and I'm pretty much total type A! I used to take pride in this, but it's a little bit of handicap for me.

I really controlled my pregnancy—and I really excelled at it. I was the healthiest, happiest pregnant woman alive. I wasn't big—I had a big belly, but I was really, really strong and fit and healthy. I felt that birth was something I needed to train for (I run marathons. Figures, right?), so I exercised all throughout my pregnancy and I hiked 3 miles right up to the DAY I gave birth! And the birth went really well, too; no drugs, of course—I can manage my pain like everything else. It wasn't until afterwards that I realized that I needed to change.

When Maggie was first born, I actually thought I could still control everything. Needless to say, chaos ensued. I fought against it for so long until I finally realized it wasn't working. When you're a parent, there is chaos in life and you can't predict everything that's going to happen. Maggie is a person and she's got her own ideas. She's got her own thing going on; she's not just a little doll who just sits there. She's bright, willful and stubborn (just like me and my husband) and I realize that I need to respect her as a person. It's not all about ME anymore, it's about us now.

And if I thought it was chaotic at the beginning, I had no idea what was coming. Now that she's 2, it's even nuttier around here! I bet if I take the parenting quiz again in a few months, I'll be a Cooperator Parent, because every day I let go and learn to change a little more.

Besides being a mom, Kellie Martin is best known for her TV roles as Becca on Life Goes On and Lucy Knight on ER.