Baby Weight Debate

I've basically lost the same 25 pounds five different times in my life. The weight seems to creep up on me during every major part of my life like an old acquaintance who keeps reappearing even though I'd be fine never seeing her again.

During both of my pregnancies, this 25 pounds turned into 55 pounds, which turned into a postpartum period that lasted over a year. After all, that is a lot of weight to lose quickly, right? Before I was pregnant, I always imagined being one of those women who would be told six weeks postpartum, "You don't even look like you had a baby!" But instead I was asked "When is your baby due?" even though mine was 3 months old and comfortably sleeping in his bassinet at home.

Truth is, I love my kids. I love being their mom. I would love to have more of them. But the problem is I would have to get fat to do it. I don't know if I am willing to that again. I have been off this weight roller coaster for two years now. I feel good. I look good. I even have my energy back. My body has its bumps and bruises. There are some stretch marks, a few varicose veins and a large C-section scar. But truth be told, I am satisfied with where my body is right now. Those 25 pounds are off somewhere, and I don't want them to come back to visit and bring new friends with them.

When people ask if I want more kids, I hesitate, because I do. I really do. But could I really do that again to my body? Do I really need to add to the ever-growing list of imperfections? Do I dare take the risk of going through this again to find out that the weight has decided to sign a lease and move in?