Pregnant People Have Feelings, Too

I know my belly's big, but there's no need to keep pointing it out!

Submitted by Kaimon

"Fat" does not become a compliment just because you're pregnant.

I'm not the type of person to obsess about my weight gain during my pregnancy. I have tried to eat healthy, and I have gained a "good" amount (not too much or too little). I happen to be a small person, so I guess it surprises people to see weight on me. I try not to let it get to me, but I am soooo tired of hearing, "OMG, you're so big!" or "Wow, look at that belly!" or "Are you sure there's only one in there?"

I know these comments aren't meant in a bad way; they come from friends who are very excited for us, but they're still a blow to my self-esteem. Last night I had one really close friend say to me, "Wow, look at you! Now I can call you fat and you can't take it personally!" He's a real sweetheart. There was nothing but love behind his statement, and I try to take the comments the right way, but it's hard when everyone talks about how big I am. I always thought pregnant women were beautiful, but it certainly doesn't feel that way now that I'm the pregnant one!

Comments

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angelamkelsay Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 10/28/2009 - 8:30PM Report Abuse	You could always go with "Yeah, I'm pregnant. What's your excuse fat ass?"
kammerbaby Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/22/2009 - 12:58PM Report Abuse	You ARE beautiful! I am dealing with the same thing. I feel so beautiful when I am in my own home, but by the time I reach work or the store or wherever, people have told me I look "Huge" or "WoW! You're going to pop any day now!", and it's so hard not to feel like a giant cow instead of the beautiful, amazing pregnant woman I am. I have tried really hard to stay in touch with the confident woman inside that feels beautiful instead of the insecure one that lets other people talking out of their rear end make her feel enormous. I, too, have a small frame and my baby is really obvious at my 5.5 months. At my last visit I asked my OB if he thought I was too big (I actually said, "Am I an enormous cow?! Because I feel good but either people keep telling me I am huge!) And he said that people feel like they can say whatever they want to you when you are pregnant and when you have kids. They'll tell you how to behave as a pregnant woman and how to raise your children. And then he reassured me that my growth is absolutely within the normal range, and that I should feel as beautiful as I am. I hope you find some solace too!! Good luck, good looking!
butterfly491 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/20/2009 - 3:56PM Report Abuse	I guess the shoe's on the other foot for me. I'm almost four months, but I haven't gained a pound. i have a little bump that no one can see but me, and my husband. (The ohter expert on my naked body! Lol) People keep telling me I don't even look pregnant, and I'm starting to wish for some weight gain. I want to look pregnant!
MommyMeYea Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/10/2009 - 4:59PM Report Abuse	I have always thought the same thing.
Kaimon Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/10/2009 - 4:53PM Report Abuse	I can't believe this is still going strong! I wrote this while pregnant with my daughter and I am now more than halfway through my second pregnancy. I still feel the same way though. Yes I realize I am pregnant, yes I realize I am going to gain weight. But the comments of "wow you're big for four months aren't you?" imply that I've gained more than I "should". So yes I will complain about people making these judgements! And FTR it's the comments that bother me. NOT my weight gain. I am a petite woman with a very short torso, baby has very little room to grow in there - so he grows out. Not to mention that my daughter was born at 9lbs 9oz so it seems I just have big (healthy!) babies!
emilym_925 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/10/2009 - 4:47PM Report Abuse	I agree totally. I feel like, even though I am barely showing, those people who know about my pregnancy continually place their hands on my belly and talk about me getting fatter by the day!!! Yuck! People seem to have a hard time saying the right things to us poor hormonal pregnant women lol.
MamaLin Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/9/2009 - 11:33AM Report Abuse	I'm on the opposite side. I hated the first trimesters (and then some) of this pregnancy and my previous, when I needed the extra food, extra breaks, etc., but not showing. I'm on the heavy side all over, so until I'm really showing I tend to get dirty looks from people saying "you lazy fat slob, go to Jenny Craig". So I appreciate the "you're huge" comments when I'm showing as opposed to the looks I get before showing. However, I understand where you're coming from - people should really think about what they're saying and how the recipient might feel before they speak.
Danielle412010 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 9/2/2009 - 11:54AM Report Abuse	I Dunno Y So Many People Are Complainin I LOVE My Growin Bump.. Shows Your Baby Is Healthy.. Ima Little Bigger Than Average Cos I Was Very Slim Before && U All Must Have Known When You Got Pregnant Your Belly Would Grow.. So Stop Complainin && Enjoy It!!!
boingomommy Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 8/26/2009 - 6:15PM Report Abuse	I am so with you ladies!! I am 17 weeks pregnant with twins ... this is my first pregnancy and there is no doubt that I am showing. I think I am all belly, but to listen to people at work talk about me I am jabba the hut! I am so tired of people telling me 'you are as big as my friend (or daughter or daughter-in-law) and she is 8 1/2 months pregnant!' I try to take the comments in stride but they really do start to get at my self-esteem. However, there are others who make me feel beautiful! And for those people I say thank you!!!
Dsmommy Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 7/2/2009 - 6:34PM Report Abuse	I have the same problem. People just don't seem to get that just because there is a baby in there doesn't mean fat huge or look at that belly are good comments to make. It's not poliet it's rude and I have gone off at many a person for it so far this pregnancy. I have a problem with that and the touching thing. My tummy is not public property, I worked as a nurse for the first part of my pregnancy and I was very upset with patients and their families for reaching out and petting me. I am not a dog and Unless you want me to pet you too don't touch my belly without asking.
Saraneth Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 7/2/2009 - 11:49AM Report Abuse	Lol, I enjoy reminding people that I'm pregnant. See, I have an excuse to eat this food and gain the weight. They don't. My sister tried calling me fat, and I just reminded her that at 6 months I still weigh less. :P
Saria0406 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 7/2/2009 - 9:04AM Report Abuse	Well which is worse? At my job there are other women who are pregnant, one 8 months the other 7 and I’m 6 months. In the beginning of my pregnancy I got really bad morning sickness and lost about 16 pound, so my belly is starting to show now. Well I’m getting mixed reviews, a few people are like “Wow that baby is really starting to grow now” others, “You’re 6 months?!? But you’re so tiny…” and at this point the lunch room goes on a debate about how big or small I am compared with the other two. Special :-/
babyluv09 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 7/1/2009 - 4:21PM Report Abuse	I think it's worse when old people just stare impolitely... like, an old man in the grocery store a few weeks ago walked all the way down the isle just to get a better look and stare for a minute and then walk away.
smm841986 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 6/25/2009 - 2:09PM Report Abuse	i hear that all the time i am only 17 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child and i am showing and have been showing since 12 weeks but i dont want people to point it out to me everytime i turn around
Secretpynk Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 6/18/2009 - 1:37PM Report Abuse	I couldn't agree more. Last night I was out to dinner with friends when one said, "That baby must be big because you are really big and you have so long to go." What!!! I almost snapped. I found myself getting defensive because I was so hurt. I am 17 weeks and I may have gained what 8lbs. It's just not acceptable to make those kind of comments, I really could have cried.
jmarie2387 Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 5/26/2009 - 12:45AM Report Abuse	I totally and completely understand! I am fairly tiny also (pre-pregnancy = 110ish).. so anyone and everyone that sees me now (I am 38 weeks pregnant and 152) always asks if I have a basketball team in there.. if I am having twins.. etc!! I get the "You're huge!!!!!!!" all the time and it is starting to get to me. At first it wasn't so bad, but after the 1000th time.............. you get the point.
Dsmommy Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 5/26/2009 - 12:07AM Report Abuse	my thought is always just because you say it in a nice voice doesnt make it nice.
DevaD Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 5/21/2009 - 1:00PM Report Abuse	I snapped at someone yesterday for telling me I was HUGE. I mean, no one wants to hear that!
mommanetoshe Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 5/14/2009 - 7:57PM Report Abuse	I'm about 19 weeks now & I wasn't really showing until just last week, then it went from nothing to bam! Baby bump. So, I'm constantly getting people at work saying, "Wow! Did you know you're showing.. ALREADY?" As if I - of all people! - wouldn't know that I am carrying a child in me! I also get random people at the grocery stores who assume I want their advice.. I just try to smile & go on, but I really can't believe some of the things that they actually say to strangers! But, your belly looks great! Keep trying to ignore the remarks - it'll get better sooner than it seems! (=
hhill Send a Note Send a Gift Write on ME page 5/2/2009 - 10:24AM Report Abuse	One lady at my work keeps telling me, "you're baby is going to be huge"! It's really frustrating.